When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Hemant Joshi
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
DumasThe great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henny Youngman"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
Sam Kinison
"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
Anonymous
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.Milton Berle
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
Wednesday, 19 February 2014
Kardashian Charm: Kylie Jenner openly flirts & throws herself all over Jaden Smith (PHOTOS)
She just couldn't keep her hands and eyes off him and at a time,looks like he was struggling to break free..Lol
She is a beauty though.....See more photos below:
Nigerian Military Declares Massive Onslaught On Boko Haram after recent attacks
A statement by the military spokesperson, Chris Olukolade, said air and ground patrols have been stepped up in forests and hills of the affected areas.
He said the military will continue to enhance the effectiveness of its mission to curtail the terrorists.
“The fighting patrols by air and land are being stepped up in the forests and hills of the affected areas and other parts of the north east where the Boko Haram terrorists are hiding. The security forces will continue to employ necessary fire power to enhance the effectiveness of the mission until the terrorists are duly curtailed,” Mr. Olukolade said.
The spokesperson also said the recent attack on civilians by the insurgents will not deter the military from its onslaught on the outlawed group.
Over 100 people have been killed in different Borno villages by the Boko Haram, who spend hours in each
village burning hundreds of houses.
Mr. Olukolade explained that the terrorists attacking the villages and killing innocent civilians were those escaping from the military onslaught against their makeshift hideout along the border and entry point from neighbouring countries.
He also said the locations prone to attacks have been reinforced while the affected areas are now under heightened surveillance and patrols.
The spokesperson said some suspected perpetrators of the recent assault have also been apprehended and weapons recovered from them.
He appealed to the general public to exercise patience and encouraged Nigerians to provide useful information to curb the activities of the fleeing terrorists.
LMAO!! A MUST READ!!!!! SANITY Vs INSANITY
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they
were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into
the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna
promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim
out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now
considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the
news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news.
The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to respond
rationally to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another
patient, I have concluded that your act displays that you have a sound
mind.
The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the
bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so
sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, when I pulled put him out of the pool he was so wet and I had to hang him there to dry. How
soon can I go home?"
were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into
the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna
promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim
out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now
considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the
news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news.
The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to respond
rationally to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another
patient, I have concluded that your act displays that you have a sound
mind.
The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the
bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so
sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, when I pulled put him out of the pool he was so wet and I had to hang him there to dry. How
soon can I go home?"
Karen Igho announces she's cancer free
On December 18th 2013, BBA winner and actress Karen Igho announced that she had cancer. She left Nigeria shortly afterwards to the UK for treatment. She took to twitter this afternoon to announce that she's cancer free. We thank God. See her tweets below:
Checkout Burnaboy's new neck tattoo (PHOTO)
Thursday, 13 February 2014
These are Séx Toys and Not Real Humans and they are Real. Seriously.
There are plenty of exhibitors at the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, but these are the weirdest new additions we could find this year.
The sex industry likes to think its on the cutting edge of extracurriculars, but these "new" products just made us giggle. Would you try them?
Just be warned that some people are likely to find the photos below disturbing, and they are definitely not safe for work.
Real Dolls
The Real Doll line of sex dolls have been around for a while, but now they're getting a little too real. For just $8,500, you can own a life-like rendering of famous porn stars. For a little more, the Real Doll company will render anyone you like into one of these. Remember the last time you were in a department store and a mannequin scared you because you thought it was a real person lurking in the shadows? Yeah, we were worried that the Jessica Drake Real Doll clone might attack us.
Brony Plugs
Hydromax
If you're afraid your penis is too small, the Hydromax is here to help (though therapy might be cheaper and more effective). You use the Hydromax in the shower and the manufacturer claims that this water vacuum pump "creates a vacuum which expands the penis to full erection, and in most cases, slightly more."
Extracurricular Exercise Balls
Lube Fountain
Remember when your mom made you get rid of all your awesome baseball cards (yeah, we had the Tops Frank Thomas rookie card, too)? Well, now, as an adult, you can start a collection again with The Adult Trading Card Company.Their website lets you create your own trading cards (humblebrag), and if you pay just a little more, your favorite adult actress will sign them for you.
My Private Pillow
The guys who made My Private Pillow told us that the average American has six pillows. SIX PILLOWS. Well, finally there's a purpose for all those extra sham pillows that you throw off the bed every night anyway. My Private Pillow has a secret pouch where you can hide all your weird toys. Or your cash. Or your weed, if you live in Colorado.
Weed Smokin' Genitalia Pipe
The App That Welcomes Your Creepy Drawings
Source: HuffPost.com
Wednesday, 12 February 2014
Did Basketmouth really snub Kim Kardashian (Photo Evidence)
Lol ...Who believes him?
See His denial below:
Cherubim & Seraphim Prophet Caught Pants Down With Married Church Member (WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS)
Prophet Adewoye who is in his seventies, is the spiritual leader and founder of Ayo Nio at the Idimu District in Alimosho Local Government Area of Lagos State.
According to report, Prophet Adewoye and Mrs Balogun often made use of her matrimonial home around Abidap Hotel at Abesan Housing Esate, Ipaja, whenever her husband was out of town but their secret love nest was said to be the recess of the church.
They both ran out of luck when they were caught red handed by Mrs. Balogun's husband who took photos of them naked. See more photos below:
However, attempts to contac Prophet Adewoye for confirmation proved futile as people close to him prevented him from being reached.
17-year-old boy arrested for raping his own mother and 4 young children
17-year-old Chibuike Maduka is said to have raped his mother and 4 young children and it is also claimed that he is a homosexual.
Maduka allegedly confessed to also indulging in sexual acts with male friends and he is said to have blamed his perverse ways on his mother.
Vanguard reports:
The suspect who blamed his strange sexual escapades on his mother, Mrs. Idam Augustina Josephine, confessed to have had sexual intercourse with his mother on several occasions and that he doesn’t know what usually compel him to have sex with children in the area.
Parading the suspect at the Command headquarters in Abakaliki, the state Commandant of NSCDC, Mrs. Ego Echendu, said the suspect was arrested after a tip-off by an
indigene of the area, adding that the suspect had in a confessional statement disclosed that he had sexual intercourse with his mother.
He said: ”We got a tip-off and sent some of our men to follow up the information concerning an adolescent male who has been in the business of raping children.
“We continued to monitor the suspect and fortunately at about 3 p.m yesterday, our divisional office at Afikpo North Local Government Area was able to locate him and his mother who, we reliably gathered, was also a key player in the son’s sexual escapades.
”The suspect confessed to have been having sexual intercourse with the biological mother and we asked to know when it started and he said last year and also claimed that the mother usually encouraged him to sleep with children of tender ages.
”Because this case involves women and children of these age bracket, we want to transfer this case to the Ministry of Women Affairs in the state for them to take it from there.
“He sleeps with his own biological mother who is in our custody now; and again he also told us that he is a homosexual, he sleeps with other male friends.
“From my analysis, I think he has some sought of brain disorder.”
Vanguard gathered that the suspect, who hailed from Amangu village in Nkpohoro, began raping young children since 2008 and a Senior Secondary School, SSS, 1 student of Oziza Secondary School, Afikpo North Local Government Area of the state.
The accused claims that his acts are the fault of his mother who he claims has bewitched him and turned his life upside down.
According to the suspect, “I’m here because of my mother. She used me for ritual. I don’t know what I’m doing. If I see a little child I will rape her; this act started in 2008; it is not my fault but that of my mother.
“I have raped my mother and four children. My father is late. I don’t know myself again. I had homosexual activities with one Emmanuel three times at Amangu in Afikpo North Local Government Area.”
Meanwhile, the suspect’s mother has denied all knowledge of or complicity in the crimes alleged.
Reacting, the mother of the suspect, Mrs. Idam Augustina Josephine, 45, denied having any sexual involvement with his son, insisting that he doesn’t know what was happening to his son.
She said: “I am 45 years and the mother of Chibuike Maduka. How can I teach my child to rape little children? I’m here because my son raped some children; he is telling a lie, he never had any sexual relationship with me.”
See Church where members worship naked because Jesus was born and crucified naked (PHOTOS, 18+)
Speaking to CNN, Mr Parker said: '
When he [Jesus] was born he was naked, when he was crucified he was naked and when he arose he left his clothes in the tomb and he was naked.''If God made us that way, how can that be wrong?
Easy Taxi Partners with Samsung to give users free ride
Nigeria’s leading taxi hailing app service, Easy Taxi has partnered with Samsung Mobile Nigeria to give customers free taxi rides on the 14th and 15th of February, 2014. Continue...
Acccording to Bankole Cardoso, Managing Director of Easy Taxi, ‘The brand, Easy Taxi is passionate about providing the safest, fastest and most convenient taxi service to Nigerians and has put in place several customer interactive measures to ensure this is achieved. The taxi service has since inception - barely six months ago - risen to provide the safest means of transportation for Lagosians with plans to expand to other states within the year. The Easy Taxi Samsung Free Cab Day is a targeted partnership with Samsung Mobile Nigeria to boost customer service and appreciate users.’
This partnership allows users of Samsung mobile devices request a taxi within Lagos for free from 9 p.m. on the 14th of February to 9 p.m. on the 15th of February 2014. The campaign is to be rounded off with an exclusive evening with RnB superstar and Samsung brand ambassador, Banky W for fans to engage, network and socialize.
For terms and conditions of this campaign, visit @SamsungmobileNG on Twitter and Instagram. Visit the Samsung Facebook Page: Samsung Mobile Nigeria and catch up with them on Google+: Samsung Mobile NG. You can also keep tabs at www.easytaxi.com/ng and follow Easy Taxi on Twitter @EasyTaxiNgeria.
Africa Fashion Week London launches the AFW in Nigeria 2014
Established in 2011, AFWL was borne out of the urgent need to support young and emerging African inspired designers in the UK & globally providing them with a professional & affordable showcasing platform that enables them to create awareness, visibility and exposure for themselves, a platform that celebrates their own kind of fashion sense and themes. Continue...
The event is fast becoming the biggest African inspired fashion event in the UK, combining runway and fashion exhibition shows in three days of perfectly paced illuminating expos. AFWL as a platform has hosted the creations of over 200 African and African inspired designers from across the African continent and the Diaspora.
From the success of the Africa Fashion Week London and the influx of creativity from Nigerian designers presented during the past editions of AFWL, we decided to host the Africa Fashion Week in Nigeria (AFWN) as there are still talented young and emerging designers who have not been privileged with the opportunity to showcase on an international platform.
AFWN intends to provide the opportunity of wide exposure to up & coming designers who have not been discovered, yet have a lot of creativity to show the world. However for creativity to grow there needs to be a platform that celebrates and supports it, hence contributing to its growth.
Nigerian designers are drawing their inspiration from years of cultural fashion history and refitting it for modern-day life, creating apparel that can actually sell at home and abroad.
NIGERIA’S NEXT TOP DESIGNER,( NNTD)
AFRICA FASHION WEEK LONDON has also launched THE FIRST REALITY TV SHOW FOR DESIGNERS IN NIGERIA (A COMPETITION SERIES)
A magnificent platform for emerging designers, it is a talent hunt show, aimed at bringing together various fashion designers from across the country to showcase the richness of the Nigerian Fashion Culture and fabrics.
Hundreds of young designers turned up from different states in Nigeria for the NNTD auditions, where they were narrowed down to 21 contestants who will be going into the NNTD house. The winner goes home with prizes including an all expense paid trip to showcase at AFWL 2014.
Notes to Editors
Our events celebrate the work of African and Nigerian designers globally, and our annual event AFWL which debuted in 2011 has welcomed over 35,000 visitors.
Created by Ronke Ademiluyi CEO, AFWL aims to be the single, biggest African Inspired Fashion event in the UK.
The Africa Fashion Week Nigeria is being hosted by AFWL & with in collaboration with Abiola Okoya of Mibod Global Resources in partnership with FADAN and Evelyn Okere of St Eve’s media and produced by Sola Oyebade of Mahogany productions
For more information about Africa Fashion Week London or Africa Fashion Week Nigeria please visit www.africafashionweeklondonweek.com
To participate in AFWL / AFWL as a designer or support the event as a sponsor, please email info@africafashionweeklondonuk.com
info@africafashionweeknigeria.com
Tel 08057001282
For media enquiries, please contact: press@africafashionweeklondonuk.com
Follow AFWL on
Website: www.africafashionweeklondon.com
Twitter: @africafwl
Facebook: /africafwl
Instagram: africafwl
Beyonce launches underwear line just in time for Valentine's Day
Boko Haram kills over 40 in attack on Konduga Village in Borno
Over 40 people were killed yesterday evening Tuesday Feb. 11th in Konduga village in Borno state by gunmen suspected to be members of Boko Haram.
The gunmen arrived the village around 5:30pm yesterday and started shooting people. Several houses and a secondary school were burnt down according to security officials who visited the village after the attack. One security personnel said he counted at least 40 bodies following the unexpected attack.
The attackers met no resistance from security agencies as they carried out their deed. Military men reportedly arrived after the men had gone and have taken over the security situation in the area.
The gunmen arrived the village around 5:30pm yesterday and started shooting people. Several houses and a secondary school were burnt down according to security officials who visited the village after the attack. One security personnel said he counted at least 40 bodies following the unexpected attack.
The attackers met no resistance from security agencies as they carried out their deed. Military men reportedly arrived after the men had gone and have taken over the security situation in the area.
Looking for where to shop for your man this Val? Check Grosvenor
Plot 164 Adetokunbo Ademola crescent wuse 2 Abuja
09 2918734
09 2918730
080 96557888
No 63,Awolowo road, Ikoyi Lagos.
08099000028
No 80,Trinity Mall, Awolowo way Ikeja Lagos
http://www.grosvenornigeria.com
Woman whose children died in Iyabo Obasanjo's car writes her an open letter
Mrs Clarke, who wasn't married to the elder-statesman when the incident happened, said she saw the need to speak up after Iyabo said in her open letter to her dad that the death of the children was what spurred her to pursue political appointments.
In the open letter, Mrs Clarke said none of the Obasanjo's have been there for her emotionally since the sad day she lost her two children in assassination attempt on Iyabo Obasanjo's life.
Iyabo has since responded to her former friend's letter. See excerpts from the letter sent to Vanguard and Iyabo's response after the cut...
"Her actions and in-actions since then would seem to indicate that she never truly appreciated the gravity of what happened that day. Iyabo in the said letter made copious references to an incident which has remained etched in my memory over this period of 10 years since my two children, one aged 10 (Adeife) and the other aged 14 (Akinola) were brutally murdered by gun men in Iyabo Obasanjo’s car as we drove from their ancestral village, Igbogun, several kilometres before Ifo in Ogun State.
At some point in the journey Ms Iyabo Obasanjo had suggested that my children should join her car with her police orderly and an elderly member of Iyabo’s family who was traveling with her on that day and her driver, while Iyabo and I drove in the car of my friend who voluntarily came to pick me up to go to Igbogun, because my driver failed to show up on that day. I had kept quiet about this incident for all these years but when I read Iyabo’s letter to her father, in which she alluded to the incident, I felt that the time had come for me to break my silence for the sake of posterity.
Up till now, justice is yet to be served, ten years after the incident. At the inauguration of the foundation which I established in memory of the children, I recall that no single member of President Obasanjo’s family, not even Iyabo, in whose place my children died, attended the launch of the foundation.
In the end, Gen. Obasanjo sent his then Minister of State for Women’s Affairs (Miss Funke Adedoyin). I also vividly recall my mother sorrowfully remarking that the Obasanjos had reduced the death of her grandchildren to a ‘women’s affair’ issue. The theme of setting up the foundation was to immortalize the names of Adeife and Akinola but painfully Gen. Obasanjo and Iyabo never got involved. Quite sadly, they never did anything in this regard and never took part in any of the various activities we organized at that point in time or since then." she said.
Iyabo Obasanjo response
There is no way to compensate Mrs Bisola Clark for the death of her two children. It is impossible to compensate for the loss of a child albeit two. As often alluded to, the loss of a child is the worst emotional pain we as humans can have. I don’t aim to undermine her loss but how does any society help someone deal with the loss of a child. I participated as a member of the board of the foundation for the children when it started and contributed funds at the start-up. I was not invited to the formal launch of the foundation and I was not in the country when it occurred.
The impression I was given was that it was for huge donors to give money and I didn’t have that kind of money to give. The foundation was a family foundation and my interference in its handling was not appreciated which I understood. I referred to the incident in my letter because I was and is still a very traumatic incident for me. I am not trying to belittle her pain, which I can not even claim to be able to fully understand. No one has ever told me the motive of the killers but of course I am well aware that if I was in my car that day I will not be alive today. In the history of our country so many senseless deaths have occurred.
I do believe we need, as a country, to consider this in our actions in trying to make these kinds of loss of life a thing of the past. The death of those two wonderful children was one of the reasons I accepted the job to come back to Nigeria and serve in some capacity first in the cabinet of Gbenga Daniel for four years, then as Senator. I was living in the US without any plans of moving back to Nigeria when the incidence occurred. My belief was and is that the only way to make this right is to make sure we create a country where such random acts of violence don’t occur and that we work to develop the country.
I failed in my attempt at that but I am still hopeful that at some point, the insecurity of life of the average Nigerian as it is today will be a thing of the past and we will create a country with adequate education and training for the youth to prevent them falling into mischief and a fair and just criminal justice system that punishes offenders, to deter. Dr. Clark and I were not even friends and who knows if we could have been without the incidence. It is now a mute point, that I went on with my life and she went with hers is not strange. We could not force a friendship where there was none.
Whether the gunmen intended to kill me or were just after the car as some have alluded to (this would be a strange way to steal a car, by putting 50 bullet holes in it) I have resolved will never be known. I don’t know what Mrs Clark will want me to do for her. If there is a way to not have those children or anyone else in the car that day, I would go back through time and do it or just even sit in my own car. I was happy to see a picture of her getting married recently on the internet and I wish her the best married life can offer.”
Check out how they care for their ATMs in Ibadan...hehe
Tuesday, 11 February 2014
Is your boyfriend serious about you? The 50 signs that show you're in a committed relationship
Researchers questioned 2,000 people to reveal the top 50 things which indicate a couple are in a committed relationship. Check on it below and tell us what you think...
1. Meeting the parents
2. Exchanging house keys
3. Planning a holiday together
4. Discussing plans for the future
5. Being invited to family gatherings
6. Saying 'I love you'
7. Staying overnight at each other's houses
8. Signing Christmas / Birthday cards together
9. Seeing each other at least every other night
10. Leaving a toothbrush at each other's house
11. You tell each other absolutely everything
12. Letting them take care of you when sick
13. Being introduced to wider friendships circles
14. Discussing how many children you might want in the future
15. Buying a dog or cat together
16. Driving each other's cars
17. Inviting them to a wedding as a date
18. Divulging salary details
19. Letting them know your pin number
20. Discussing holidays
21. Having a drawer at each other's house
22. When you HYPOTHETICALLY talk about IF you lived together
23. Inviting people round as a couple
24. Having clothes and other belongings at each other's houses
25. First name terms with their mum and dad
26. Talking about intimate health issues
27. Farting in front of each other
28. Inviting them out with your friends / family
29. Receiving cards or gifts addressed to both of you
30. When you know what each other's plans are for every single day
31. Showering together
32. Changing Facebook status to 'in a relationship'
33. You know each other's passwords
34. Wearing pyjamas when you get home from work
35. You share secrets about friends with each other
36. Always being the 'plus one' on invites
37. Getting food in your big shop just for them
38. You start watching TV shows they like
39. Phoning each other at work
40. Stop putting make up on to look gloriously fresh before they wake up
41. When they start asking for your opinion on stuff
42. Going out with friends or family without the partner being there
43. Signing off 'love' in a card
44. You start listening to music they like
45. You stop seeing people you know they don't like
46. Putting a photo of the two of you on Facebook
47. Sending good morning / goodnight texts
48. Having a pet name for each other
49. Telling each other how many sexual partners you've had
50. When all their friends add you on Facebook
AY set to open multimillion Naira non-smoking night club in Lekki
It’s a strictly non-smoking Nightclub, set up to be the entertainment home and official recreation centre for moguls, superstars, leading lights, and ‘Most Valuable Players’ of all walks of life, resident in Lagos, in other parts of Nigeria, and in other parts of the World. Continue to see more photos...
MVP’s official grand opening party will take place on Easter 2014 Weekend in a 3-Day event. On Good Friday, April 18, 2014 the Club will open for the first time to the VIP Public from 8pm. The Following day, it will hold the Pre Party of AY Live at MVP. It will be a night to party with superstars on the Bill of AY Live on Easter Sunday. Then, it will have the After-Party of AY Live at the Event.
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